Happy Father’s Day!
I did not want have to write on a Sunday again but things did not go that way. I will explain later. Anyways, I want to take time to thank my dad for dealing with me the last 26 years. I have learned so much from you. I am thankful for everything you have done from teaching/helping with sports, working on the car(s), life and much, much more. Thank you.
Just like I said with Mother’s Day, we need to celebrate the different male role models that we have in our lives. I could name them all but that could take a bit. You know who you are. Thank you all for being a great supporting cast. Thank you for teaching me how to be a loving person. Thank you for teaching me how to serve even though there are times that you had to go completely out of your way. There is more I can be thankful for but this could turn into a novel like Mother’s Day could have.
Also, thank you to the men and women who had to be both role models. You all are super heroes. Seriously.
I had something totally different I wanted to write about. Here is a little background on how I write these blogs: I go about my life through, a certain day I get motivation to write, I write about whatever is going on.
I do not plan anything out. I do not have a calendar that talks about what I will write for the 3rd blog or the 10th blog. For me, I try to stay away from that style because I know I will put too much pressure on myself. I would want the blog to be this perfect piece.
And you know what? I tried doing that. I wanted to talk about a certain subject. I wrote the blog out…
I did not like it. I tossed it and wrote again.
Same result. Then again.
Yeah… You get the picture here.
Did not work. So I went back to how I usually write. No plan. No agenda. Just vomiting words that I feel for that particular day or days or week. So, here we go.
This week has been tough. A lot has been happening and honestly, my brain and emotions cannot keep up. Usually, I have been better with coping. For some reason, this week just was not my week.
It was overload. I tried using my coping methods: Reading (5 hours of reading), writing (I wrote this blog post 5 times), going to the gym (my body is sore), going on a walk. Nothing was working and it sucked.
And I know, a blog or two ago I wrote about how I was feeling really good. How I was learning to love myself again. There was more but I do not feel like going back (you can read it here). So what the he(ck) changed?
Absolutely nothing. I still feel much better where I am at today than I did a month ago. It is just an off week. I will spare you all the details. It was hard.
But, not everyday is going to be all sunshine and rainbows. That would be pretty sweet though, wouldn’t it?
Did I eat way too much pizza this week? You bet. Did I drink a regular Dr. Pepper? Yep (cut me some slack, it was my second pop in 3 months). Did I eat too many cake pops that technically were not mine? Uh, what do you think? Of course.
This is life. Sometimes you feel really great and then there are times you want to live in a cave. My coping methods did not work. It happens. It looks like I will have to do some more research and personal testing on some more methods I can use.
I am still learning about myself. I am still learning how human I am (that sounds really weird but it makes sense to me). I am still learning how to deal with my emotions. I am still learning how to react.
I am happy still. But also, I am sad. And that is okay. (Did I not tell you that I was going to just vomit words everywhere?). I am not sure the point of this post. Perhaps one of you are feeling the way I feel? Maybe this will help us know that we are not alone in our journeys?
If today is tough, find something that makes you smile and sorta roll with it. See where it leads. Maybe you will learn something about yourself?
And that is pretty cool.